I'm Done With You

Just like that, you can make me push my feelings for you away and not feel anything but anger. Yes, I'm angry with you now. You can thank your mom. See, she e-mailed my Dad yesterday asking for his help, but she added that you had gotten over it and moved on. When I heard that after Dad read me the e-mail, I wasn't sure whether I wanted to cry or punch you. To be honest, if you lived in the same city and I had a way to get to you easily, I would have punched you last night. But not today. I'm done. If you are able to move on so quickly and are able to get over it just like that, then that just means that I never meant anything to you. This makes me think that you are just like every other guy and I was completely wrong about you. All you wanted was sex, right? That's when things changed. I gave it to you once and after that, it was a little different. You knew I was okay with it because I had already been with my ex before you.

I took you off my facebook and your mom too. I told my Dad not to help your Mom. It's probably selfish and stupid, but I don't care anymore. You lied to me and hurt me. Plus, you don't want anything to do with me, so I'm not going to have anything to do with you.

But you want to know the absolute worst part? If you really needed me, I would be there in a heartbeat. And that absolutely kills me to think about. For one, you won't ever need me. And for two, you wouldn't do that same. And for three, no matter how much I push my feelings away or become numb to it, I will always love you. I hate it! I absolutely hate it...

Now, I'm more angry than anything and I just want to hurt you because deep inside, I'm hurting. The sad thing is, this all started because of me. I broke up with you. Then, after I cooled down, I tried to fix things and talk to you, but you said you were done. I hoped there might have been a chance far in the future, but not anymore. Not after this.

I'm so tired of feeling like I meant so little to people when they meant so much to me.

How is it so easy to get over me?

Am I just that worthless to people?

What's wrong with me?